HelloKitty wrote on Jul 23
rd, 2019 at 1:22pm:
There has to be a happy medium between short term goal of running max difficulty for your own maximum RXp gain, and long term goal of not just burning the healer out so they quit and you have no healer.
^This
Gaming is a chance for us to socialize, and online gaming is convenient because we can do it without driving (or flying - we have guild members on 3 continents), after the kids are in bed, whatever. And DDO is just one of the games we play. It's not even anybody's favorite, it's just one we're all OK with so it stays in the rotation for variety.
It's not a job, and the thing we want to maximize is our fun, not our rate of XP gain. And certainly not our RXP gain, we never step into reaper anymore, not even R1. I'll do low reapers occasionally if I'm pugging, but only if that's the only group I can find. It's a grind I choose to skip.
So yeah, I could push my healer harder, I could get more RXP per minute, I could be a more efficient hamster, but if I did I'd lose in the long run.
That said, she's leaning towards an Evoker build, but it makes me sad to think she may be doing it because she thinks she's not doing enough for the party, or may get laughed at, if she goes with the style she wants. A melee cleric may be relatively weak (and it's good to know that!) but it should be more than able to handle the content we want to play. It's still weeks away (we're gathering gear and I'm getting an alt ready to TR with her) so she may flip flop a few more times before it happens, I'll let you know how it goes.